Divorce comes with a truckload of emotions: loss, anger, rejection, hurt, denial, confusion, and many more. It can be difficult navigating these emotions and the transition from being in a relationship to being single.
Don't get trapped in the tunnel of emotions. You can still live a full, happy life after a divorce by getting your groove back!
Here are 6 ways to rediscover yourself after a divorce:
Get back in touch with yourself
Being married is like being a different person living in a different planet. You give up parts of yourself along the way and for some, you might have even forgotten what you did and enjoyed before you were married.
One key step to finding yourself after a divorce is tuning back into those things you enjoyed doing while you were single. Did you like dancing, karaoke with friends, hiking, dressing up, reading, painting? Another thing is to try those activities you always wanted to try but couldn't. Travelling, soapmaking, getting a dog, whatever it is, it's a good way to rediscover you.
Work through your emotions
The emotions a divorce brings can weigh you down and will keep affecting your life if you let it.
Repressing feelings because they hurt or remind you of painful memories is not helpful.
Working through these emotions, figuring out why you feel the way you feel will help you recover fully in the long run. If you can understand and let go of your painful emotions, it will be easier for you to enjoy life post-divorce without blaming yourself for it.
Reconnect with Friends
Remember those good friends you had back in university, your old neighborhood, people you kept promising to call but never did? Now is the time to reach out to them. Getting in touch with friends is a great way to remember who you were before you were married. Friends can get you to try new things, and many times, will be willing to go on your rediscovery journey with you.
Apart from old friends, this is also a time to make new friends! Try joining clubs/groups that tie into your passion such as a book club or a church group or a dance class.
Be careful with new relationships
Don't rush into new relationships after a divorce.
Try to avoid going into relationships to prove that you are still attractive or desirable or because you are afraid that you may never find love again. Take your time to relearn who you are, to reflect on the mistakes you made, and to affirm your identity as an individual.
Ask for help
Divorce may be a breath of fresh air for some but a moment of anguish for others. Regardless of your situation, it can be confusing and sometimes difficult. You are not an island, ask for help. Speak to other divorced people on how they coped, spend time with supportive family and friends, and use other available resources like books for help. It gets better.
Get a makeover
What says new you better than a new look? Nothing! Change your hairstyle, switch up your makeup look, try yoga, go vegan, start exercising regularly, there's so much to choose from.
A makeover can be the solid push that you need to step out of your old persona and embrace your new life.
Conclusion
A divorce can be trying even if it ends amicably. Amidst the whirlwind of emotions, it can be easy to lose yourself. Try to avoid this by taking a chance to rediscover who you are and what makes you happy.
