The idea that boys and girls are innately different is one that has been in existence for ages. These ideas that boys are from Mars and girls are from Jupiter extend even into the kind of responsibilities we assign to each gender and the expectations society demands from them.
Researchers have wondered if the differences between boys and girls stem from biological differences such as differences in testosterone levels or from differences in how they were raised.
However, it is encouraged that you raise both children similarly with the same values.
Here are some ways to do so:
Focus more on individual differences than gender differences
Parents attribute a lot of things to innate differences in boys and girls but this may not necessarily be so. If you teach them to clean up after themselves regardless of whether they are boys or girls, they will adopt these ideals and grow with it. While biological differences will influence certain actions, try to look at children in terms of individual differences.
Look at these examples:
Treat them like equals
Don’t let a male child get away with certain things that the female child would be punished for. Research has shown that parents are more likely to tell female children to be careful when playing roughly but excuse the action in boys as “just being boys”. In some parts of the world, male children are still sent to school while their sisters stay home or are only allowed to reach certain levels of education.
This creates an aura of inequality that will persist even in adulthood. Assign the same punishment, give the same/similar rewards for achievements, and allow both children the space to explore.
Give them the same nurture and care
Boys are regarded as more emotionally reserved than girls, is this because of their innate nature or how they were raised. Research has shown that actions that encourage relationship building and empathy are used more with girls than boys. Mothers speak and interact with their female children more than their male children even though boys respond similarly to girls while dads will rough-house with boys than girls.
Dads are more likely to tell boys to get over sad feelings or failures but will encourage their daughters to talk about it. Parents are also more likely to read, tell stories, and sing to their daughters instead of their sons. Differences in care can affect how your male and female child behave. Try to give children the same/similar levels of care.
Conclusion
The final verdict remains that while biological differences exist and should be taken into account, boys and girls should be raised with the same core values and care. Don’t excuse wrong behavior because the child is male and then punish the same behavior in a female child.
