Tantrums can be frustrating and you may find yourself doubting your parenting skills, but temper tantrums are a normal aspect of raising children. Children between the age of 1 and 4 are more likely to throw tantrums for one main reason; they haven’t learnt to cope with overwhelming emotions or communicating their needs. Tantrums are your toddler’s way of telling you what they need: food, a clean diaper, a specific toy, helps with a task, or a way of asserting their autonomy as they grow older.
Here are 5 effective ways to deal with your toddler’s tantrums:
Ignore the situation
Sometimes, tantrums can be triggered by a need for attention and no real concern. If you keep responding to this behavior, you may unintentionally reinforce it and they will believe it’s acceptable. Unless they are putting themselves or others around them in physical danger, ignore the tantrum. You can leave the room for a bit and come back at intervals to check on them. In most cases, the tantrum will die down without your attention to feed it. Teach your toddler more effective ways to get your attention.
Distract them
Children can be easily distracted from the source of their tantrum because they have short attention spans. Look for quick and easy ways to nip tantrums in the bud. For instance, if they are crying over not having a specific toy, you can grab their attention with a different one. If your toddler hates going to the hospital, you can make up quick games to play on the way such as telling them to count all the blue cars they can see.
Children are very curious and will become interested in whatever new and shiny thing you have presented as an alternative.
Avoid shouting/yelling
Your child will learn how to deal with situations by watching you and modeling your behavior. Keep in mind that their tantrum is caused by an inability to communicate their needs effectively and try to stay calm. Avoid shouting at them because they may match your behavior and shout too or cower and hide away from you, both of which defeats the purpose of teaching them to communicate.
Try to refrain from punishments
Tantrums can appear inconsequential to you, an adult, but to a toddler, it is a storm of emotions. Tantrums often start off small but can rapidly escalate to your toddler screaming their head out and feeling genuine pain at being misunderstood. Punishments are a good means of negative reinforcement but they can have the wrong effect in this situation. Rather than time-outs, try to identify why your child is throwing a tantrum and find a solution. Isolating the child is not a right choice and can create more negative emotions.
Take note of the warning signs
Observe your toddler and pick up on the signs they exhibit as they get upset. Every child is unique but common signs include: pouting, frowning, refusing to speak or listen to you, disagreeing, or looking away from you. If you have a good handle on the pre-tantrum signs, you will be able to stave off full-blown tantrums.
Conclusion
Your toddler is rapidly processing a lot of emotions and information and trying to assert their independence, difficulty communicating these emotions or reaching a goal can lead to temper tantrums. Remember to model good behavior that they can copy when dealing with their tantrums.
